so there really was life after dead

particular energy

A few sentences are in Book Antiqua style and date from 9/1O/2010 or have been later introduced or reworked. Original text I wrote in 2003

So there really was life after death. Herwerken want met vertaalmachine
About ten, twelve years ago I wrote the following senses: ” Peace will come in the heart of the ones with honest souls. Prevent the world from destruction and lead people to better lives. Never forget that the world is indivisible. There is but one life and one world, takes your responsibility and live as intense as possible. Be wise and light to be a guide. Go to the people and speak of joys to be. Your place is where you will feel free. Explain them the difference between the material world and the spiritual matter. Truth is simple. Truth hides in the past, lives in the present and needs the future. Why does one find so little joy between many people? People do not wonder enough about who they are and what means and what the lives they lead mean. They should be more philosopher than materialist, they should ask themselves why they live in a world of wealth and poverty, war and peace, stress on the work and unemployment. But there are other reasons for the lack of joy… reasons about which one cannot yet write and reasons about which nobody can write.”
By means of this short story, I’ll try to show what ‘dead’ in fact means.
there was life after dead !

introduction : through the past in a few lines
—————————————–————————-
Nothing is more ‘real’ then living life itself, how real art as well can be.
We all, we are characters in a real novel that has been going on since ages.
Persons create persons and then vanish again.
Since thousands of years we try to put our experiences in to signs.
The more you understand about it, the harder sometimes to put it down in words.
The good man does, continues to live after him
The evil also. Positive and negative interact in completion.
The sense of it all, in every way a powerful, meaningful something.
One can only observe and react, starting from an indifferent equilibrium
Science can give us a logical explanation about life.
A trained observer experiences more ten the logic of things
Objective sciences mostly only have an eye for their field.
Philosophy, Psychology and history must unify the other logic.

Einstein put together the achieved and unveiled a new point of view.
Time, space and matter became more relative then we thought.
Religion tried to make us believe in Gods and God.
Knowledge and truth still were far away from proving a new kind of unity.
Marxists tried to understand the laws of history.
Conservative establishment was against the sense of life socialism discovered.
But nobody could control the subjective factor.
Freud and others tried to show the role of the unconscious.
But they did not discover the deeper meaning of life.
We all, could be more people looking for the meaning of life.
A meaning that surpasses life and dead.
But we are caught in a lot of kinds of habits and ‘pain’.
Life itself is a source of inspiration for everything I wrote about in every literary form.
I can stop writing and let it go by me till I understand the meaning of it better within a few years…or I can try to make a rapport of it every day. I taught about the structure of my day and had a look at my work and the things I studied, the documentaries I kept on video, some newspaper-articles which I kept because I thought they had a lasting value. To make this understandable for readers, I first had to bring them a number of philosophical life-attitudes. How to start this ? Those attitudes were partly the result of a critical study of the existing attitudes and partly the result of my own practical experiences midst all kinds of persons which are to be found in every one’s life.
We’ve all got them : family, lovers, friends, social and political persons,… .
With all that ‘brainstorming’ going on in my head, I was afraid of ‘boiling over’ and remaining on my chair till inspiration came, looked like dangerously reaching a unallowable border. I went outside to sit on a chair and stumbled back inn. Symbolically I closed the door. Something cracked inside me.
I closed my eyes for the last time here on earth. An unexpected goodbye, where I had thought a lot about. A few things I had imagined, became true. The experience itself was a quite different, something comparable whit what I had experienced during the burning to ashes of an old colleague of mine. There was this kind of magnetism that started in my feet and got upwards, like it seemed to be coming from the ground. When it reached my hart, I taught ‘oh’, ‘something is wrong with me’. But no, the magnetism accelerated it ‘ s speed and once in my head, it became a kind of more-dimensional triangle, pyramid kind of ‘light dimension’ which, like a starship in science-fiction vanished into space. This form of yellow kind of light, did it disappear into the spaces of micro cosmos or the ones of macro cosmos ? Or was there an indifferent equilibrium in between ?
Probably I was in the anti-matter that every matter has, in the microcosmical world …but that world is everywhere, even in the macro-world. Was I in somebody or in the spiritual world as a unity ? So I did solve a part of the mystery ‘god is everywhere’. I happened to be in the antimatter of all the elements that once composed me, radiation as well as minerals, gasses and so on.
In any case, there was life after dead.
During my life, I had three different options about dead. We surely fell back into the elements from which we were composed; energies like minerals, water, air, light and waves with each their own kind of consciousness. Since we were connected genetically with the rest of the biological world…we were not dead in that sense. As a third option I already suspected that all ones usable experiences in life, which had started with the genetic three …before one’ s life; after dead could be used as an energy working in two directions. That energy, like the electrons it was made of, is not destroyable; it can only change in form…and that is what happens to us before and during and after our life.
I experienced my ‘dead’ as being reborn in another dimension, in the awareness that ‘I’ and ‘we’ had already lived for ever…far before the existing of the first atom and the first cell…as a kind of physical energy with a ‘soul’, a bit if like the center of something ‘good’, like an artist trying always to express himself, wanting to become atom and cell and so on; while the entire process creates structure and cooperation in the different elements. And even if the total of matter should disappear, it would emerge in another point. That other point, that is the same, is the point with in the cycle of the 8-form. Like in DNA and the hart as center of the blood circulation. Like a star as the center of a part of macro matter and an atom as the center of micro matter a bit as well.
The feeling I had, was like watching the light that from the evening colors passes into the dark of the night and in a number of light gradations is being born again in the morning.
Just as like when you are living, when you do not know if there is life after dead, when you are dead , you do not know if you still have a body or not. This is strange, very strange…from one ‘mystery’ you in fact dive into another.
My individuality began a long journey alongside our collective and individual past to the point of my dead, where individuality again seemed to vanish in collectivity and yet it had a separated existence at the same time. It all happened rather fast, but on earth I would have needed many pages to describe. The voyage I was on, went from atom to cell and the building up of our existing society, it was like turning the pages of an educational book, but in a more clever than a digital way even. The more clear the message and contents from the journey were, the more effort the voyager had spent in his life, to understand the meaning of life.
The spiritual world was like a kind of internet-community, composed of the different kinds of tempers of everyone who had existed so far. Every life was a kind of ‘home-page’ in fact…with branches to all the ones in the human story they had known. ‘Had known’ or ‘knew’…it was not yet clear to me. It seemed that the better it became to live on earth, the more beautiful the symbolism between the ones that already past away (the past away’ s) and the still living in a classical way became. Was this what moved the interaction between the two worlds ?
As soon as I reached a certain point NOW on my and our earthly past, the new laws of my new form of existence, became clear to me. They not only made my speechless, I also could not ‘speak’ any more, when I got aware in which manner I could only express myself at the biologically living persons.
There also was the awareness that they could use my energy and I theirs…but only in a symbolical, intuition manner through thinking and dreams and images and things that happened…a kind of ‘inspiration’ in fact.
I did not only have a ‘voice’ any more, I also did not ‘see’ any more…because I myself had become a part of light and air and all the other elements I was composed of…without knowing exactly what…like one cannot see one’s own inside organs and like one can only see oneself in a mirror. We only can feel the intensity of who we are. Still I was able to think by means of images and thoughts, like one can see images in his head in a biological body…al dough some scientists say that they aren’t there. Stronger than before I felt the good person I had always been.
Another thing that became clear to me, was that I did not knew if I could still ‘hear’, because like something that was said…I could remember hearing voices and sometimes I wondered if a voice wasn’t a taught.
With ‘being dead’ the ‘emphasis’ was being put more on ‘feeling’, even ‘thought’ was a feeling. Trying to feel with who in life you really were connected with. Not literally ‘feeling’, but ‘touching each other in the spirit’, not in the ‘mind’(like in the soul) on earth…but it still seemed much like the positive feelings parents and friends can have for each other. It became clear to me, that during one’s life on earth all the consciousness and deeds one collects; all that positive and negative energy that interacts…at the same time on the ‘other side’ is being put together like a puzzle. The final ‘result’ gives you the amount of ‘inner knowledge’ you have reached when you die. Once when we no longer are biological, we can feel the intensity of who we are.

Ones earthly ‘soul’, based on positive and negative emotions, who commands ones earthly life; sometimes let’s go some pieces of ‘spiritual information’, we the ‘past away’ s’ , need…in order to be able to pass on our information. One’s final dead is the unified picture of your life, offered to you. From the moment you understand this at the other side, you get a kind of spiritual orgasm that enables you to realize that you are not alone at the other side…and that one can communicate as well with other spirits over there.
Just like on earth one needs other people to be oneself. On earth sometimes some people are aware of these things, but those moments seem to disappear because the amount of events that come and go. On the ‘other side’ there also are times when one can isolate oneself…that often are moments when one is the most in unity with everyone and everything. Not always nevertheless.
Just like a child that is born all of the sudden is surrounded met beings with which it has another kind of intensity in contact…no longer the strange noises from in the belly. People who believe in classical reincarnation would say that this is the bridge from one live to another, even if they believe that the soul only enters the body with birth.(Sunday 24 april2011 Eastern, most hot day in 60 years in Belgium).
On very clear moments in one’s life one can realize these things, but due to the fact of the never stopping flow of events, one is not always conscious of this process.
Like on earth, life after dead is not always ‘romantic’…because the process of consciousness that started with the voyage from atom to cell, organism, animal, men and society…that process continues after dead. It depends on your merits whether you are armed to be able to continue that awareness-project. Your ‘hierarchy’ as well depends from your merits…and this has not much to do with the diplomas you got, neither with the kind of work you did? You ,’biological living ones’ should be amazed about some people you taught you knew and who they are over here. But later more about that. If I get permission to say something about it, I will, but I have a feeling I won’t.
To be able to explain all this I have to get back to my puzzle of life

There was a reason why I had lived and still was living
I ‘watched’ the places in the world that I had abandoned and ‘saw’ de growth of the harvests on the fields near the roads I had lived and traveled. I saw the cars on the roads and the smoke coming from factories and some houses. I saw the animals, but he people, I did not see. Maybe I was in the people and that is why I could not see them anymore.
Very strange in the beginning. My friends only lived in my memories…I only could see them in my memories, which was a way of better understanding how they felt…even on a present stage basis.
But how they felt did not preoccupy me at the moment, I needed my energy to concentrate on a text of a novel or essay I wanted to complete. I had called the introduction ‘my inspiration maps’.
I saw the text lying on my desk, but how could I finish this book ?
Maybe there somewhere was a writer with still a biological life to lead, who read one of my former works and did not have any inspiration of from himself at the moment. During my life I had called into existence enough energy to allow me at this moment to be ‘connected’ with a living soul mate.
I would finish my book, through him. Sometimes he would be aware of my special kind of presence without knowing. Sometimes we were aware of each other, when he walked amongst the threes in the wood and taught about something he read about me. I always wanted to plant a wood myself and there was this writer who lived in a wood near water and entered his chalet, took the newspaper and cut out my photo and an article on my life. It gave me new energy to continue writing. A lot of writers were still continuing something amongst ‘us’ and ‘them’. Sometimes there seemed to be no difference amongst ‘them’ and ‘we’. Al dough we did not see ‘them’ busy with something…we felt what was going on in their world. Like the living sometimes were busy with the question what would happen after their dead, we, ‘past away’ s’ were busy wondering what our next life in the ‘after afterworld’ would be like. Our form of energy in the afterworld wasn’t eternal either and one day would change it ’s form as well. In a way we had we had bettered ourselves because we mainly communicated with spirits from the afterworld that used to have the same interests as we. It was very special how each of us tried to do this in his own way.
Those who as farmers had been concerned about agriculture, received energy from those who had liked doing this on earth. Communication between both sides worked as a system of connected fluids in different spaces. The negativism of a minority of farmers or landowners on earth often prevented the flowing of communication between farmers that had died and those still active on earth. Sometimes the representatives of the farmers in the afterworld came looking for advice with spirits that often had to deal with the same problems when they worked as farmers for example.
Then there was a communication amongst them and only the fact of this ‘exchange’ itself made it possible to generate some actions below that would improve something or that made farmers below aware. But sometimes it looked like a never ending struggle in each domain.
In the afterworld, the ones who caused those problems in the past suffered until some improvement was made.
So my friend the medium-writer had to tell people below to watch out and think about the suffering of their relatives in an heaven, that wasn’t always ‘heaven’ to them. Their relatives or people responsible for some misery of others should have to do something about it…before they end in the same position. If they act know, the ones who are at the origin of blockades between this world and the next shall free themselves here and in the next stage of life. In the afterworld the painfull part of the existence of ordinary working people is more quickly healed then of those who were responsible for big decisions. People who had mainly good intentions adapt very easily in what the afterworld has to offer. People who produced many good waves and did many good things to help others …still can feel how they are doing…without suffering and without being able to help them, when they aren’t conscious enough to ask it.
Those wise ‘afterworld’-men only can give some inspiration and advice, but the ‘receiving parts’ of the biologically living people have to be functioning…and they don’t when they are not in an emotional balance. Someone with too much negative emotions is a real problem for both the one below who is partly responsible for those emotions as for the one on earth. In many cases, help must come from other identities. Both groups have an important tool to help one another : the free will to act. This free will is a total product of all the situations where it was used and can for reasons, difficult to track down here on earth, be temporally blocked for both groups or their individual components. There for it is sometimes better not to act or stay in a position of indifferent balance.

The afterworld in which we function, only can make us philosophe about our ‘after afterworld’ because from time to time some ‘spirits’ disappear here, like on earth, some ‘souls’ disappear.
We use the term ‘after spirits’ here. We are trying to find the way to get in contact with them. Like on earth we still are in a kind of phase in between. Such a phase, like on earth you can divide in a number of stages of progressing or backsliding consciousness. Once more, what was already clear to me on earth became more clear to me in the afterworld. Everything is one and connected, but there are a number of phases. Like from silence seven sounds are born, with whom one can compose music, like from white all other colors are born. Like thought, feeling and inspiration can produce at least seven expressions of literature…from shouting to poetry…..Like one can touch someone’s skin in several ways as well. It was rather strange that some of us missed those last feelings and others didn’t. Why ? Again a question for us to solve. Did ‘time’ only continued to exist for those not feeling well because of existing ? Could we provoke the urge for a new genetic consciousness among the classical living ones ? “Did the classical ling beings then feel the urge to make new life, new individuals to come and continue the unfinished stories of the living and in a way of the dead ? Was this possible ? (24/4/2011)”
The search for a ‘why’ and ‘how’ was a never ending story it seemed.
Looking out for a new stage of existing in our development was a new kind of enigma, riddle to us.
I , unlike others, did not believe that we were going to reincarnate in another earthly body after disappearing out of the afterlife. I believed more in spiritual growth and trying to show the ones on earth, our genetic three, we partly left behind; that they had to help themselves to be get conscious happy and make a better world…in order to have a better life as well in the afterworld and help us at the same time by doing so. Ou

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April 26, 2011. philosophy, religion, spirituality, Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

to be or not to be, but what is to be ?

I am I said

The begining of time never existed.

We give and take and leave our traces.

Circumstances were always different, ‘evolution’ you know,… ‘beiing’ was, is, will always be one.

Even when on a sudden day it looks like ‘beiing’ isn’t there any more.

Maybe it left us, hopefully, as enriched radiation. Back to the roorts of biological life.

There are a number of ways to express oneself if one wants to communicate about the essence of life.

I could pass you films about the beauty of the universe.

I could show you pictures, send you some music, encourage you to use your artistic skills, your talents, study… .

I could translate some texts I wrote so far, guide you to my main blogs and their links and those of others.

I could tell you stories the roles in life we play for others.

I could invite you to come and talk about it or to react by email.

I could post videos with spoken explanation, but the effort to understand starts in your own environment.

It would lead us to far, in time, as one grows older and one learns to deal with emotions, one gets wiser… .

In our own lifetime we evoluate, based on our levels of consciousness and knowledge and people we meet.

Everyone has their own experiences in life to interpretate and deal with, learn and share with others.

Life is not just something that happened by coincidence.

It is something completely spiritual that translated itself in to matter starting from the radiation after a bigbang.

Why was there a bigbang, probably in a cycle of bigbangs ?

Because something that tends to become smaller or equal than zero tends to explote.

Symbolically (spiritually) this means that something without a form cannot exist.

When something tends to become meaningless, it disapears in to another form of energy.

Because of the growing pressure to evoluate, it’s lifetime is limited.

Whether a social or an individual relationship, that basic law of ‘making sense’ controls all evolution.

The road from radiation to atom, molecule,cell, organisms…to us or from tribe to modern society…breads evolution.

In each episode their are laws of attraction that play their part in the game of growing consciousness.

Everything has a core in the micro and macro world. Galaxies, milky ways, stars, atoms…our own inner.

An atom has a proton (+) and neutron position (+-), the surrounding electrons are –

Symbolically this means that an atom or even a person can react or not, atoms with energy, we in words,mimicry…

or one can take an observatorish attitude…opting for a kind of indifferent balance.

Whatever we do always depends of what came in to existence before us.

Philosophically the question is : in how far are we free to choose and in how far are we determined by what and who ?

It might be a question over the border of those who lived and those who live.

One can interpretate something logically-scientifically or (and) symbolically.

If one considers science in this way, it not only tells us a scientific story, but one with a purpose.

Every life once lived, was preparated to become in to beiing aware of more and more.

We have a choice, taking an interest in what philosohers, writers…scientists said and say or not.

We can decide to play computergames all day and taking no intrest in what is goiing on in society.

We can chose to live without taking a real intrest in the souls of the ones we love or happen to know.

What we can not escape from is the untruth we believe in, because we were told so or because we made our selves believe in.

August 10, 2010. philosophy, Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

questions for workers

QUESTIONS FOR WORKERS, dear comrades
Why is it we are still being ruled by representatives of bancs ?
Why you work so hard while so many are without a job ?
Why is having a job not normal ?
Why can’t you easily find a new job ?
Why our telecom services, our energy and transport are not free ?
Why still not one worldcurrency or an administration based on need ?
Why some of us need the discpline of old ideologies to function ?
Why not our inner discipline or the one of our colleagues in charge ?
Why not we but them should be afraid of doiing away with speculation ?
Why does the same product does not cost as much everywhere ?
Why is poverty a form of official slavery ?
Why so few people control so much wealth ?
Why so few robots comand so many soldiers ?
Why religions are not as much spiritual then our inner energy ?
Why imperialism calls war humanitarian aid, free world and democracy ?
Why do criminals control economy, whether in USA,ex- USSR or Liberia?
Why do tradeunions follow the games of bigmoney ?
Why do we not understand that ‘foreigners’ can be workers to ?
Why we still make weapons to kill our comrades elsewhere ?
Why do kings anq queens still exist ?
Why not use technology and technocracy to build a beautifull world ?
Why doesn’t education teaches more about human sciences ?
Why do we pay taxes aswell for putting mines as demining them ?
Why do factories or aerocompanies close when demand is so big ?
Why are farmers payed to destroy or not produce, while so much hunger ?
Why so much short of housing ?
Why our dogs and cats eat more money then some earn ?
Why their system survives by means of crises, wars and exploitation .
Why do we keep on collaborating while modern fascism is so strong ?
Why our media talk in favour of what’s gooing on ?
Why is the right to vote, the right to say yes to the system ?
Why don’t we put forward our own program first ?
Why don’t we defend our own alternative in the enterprises we work ?
Why don’t we invite the jobless to join our reunions ?
Why don’t we develop our new strategy to put our demands in power ?
octo

February 6, 2010. Tags: , , . poems, Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

philosophy poem

philosophy
the dry leaf leaves the three
what a windy musical way to go, who left who ?
the three the leaf or the leaf the tree ?
the answer : as one as chicken and egg…that will do.
in every atom there is already an idea
like it takes you and me to get to three
philosophy makes this interaction understood
from where life began till what’s to be done
the more patient and wise
the more nihilism looses it’s disguise
no distance between reptile and human beiing
now we understand, then we were only seeing
life, one big orchestra of real art
each of us playing our daily part
dating back from times nobody counted the days
when space and matter wanted to find a way
to express by word and image where they came from
to unfold the mystery of the becoming of real freedom
even if you do not act …you do !
the neverending spiritual adventure needs you too
life is not only about genes beiing created
but also about values beiing updated
the laws of nature are the notes of life
matter wrote the symphony for the piece of man and wife
matter became us, we became friends, family, lovers…
…why, is what we will have to discover
our essences confront each other
sometimes we help by not helping, not bother
biology transmits it’s problems and solutions
the new generations always ad to the conclusions
love is lightening the strong and weak parts
it proves that living together is the greatest art

February 6, 2010. poems, Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

oh holy whisper

Oh heavenly whisper
Hadn’t seen here in years. But in the night she came in a dream. We met, set on the kitchen table of long ago, talked long and deep while in fact, I was in Africa for two weeks, and she in Europe. We talked about what we had learned and what we had left. To blame was the situation in general. We were born out of a force of circumstances and while growing up we were confronted with the unsolved negative emotions of others and our own.
What is faith in a love-relationship ? Is it an agreement to stay faithful to one person in body and soul or is it a commitment to deal with the heritage of what went wrong in the relationships before our birth, which in the end, had to lead to us ? It’s the second part of the answer that is the most difficult part to analyze, because roads tend to split because one person does not have all the answers.
Men do not understand why women often seem to run in to tears more ten they do. When a woman wants to break up a relationship, she will try to put the ‘blame’ on the male…or the other way around. If there where break ups before in the same or other relationships, one can use the past experiences to get out of the situation, or at least to stay calm. One can learn a lot about life when one has compassion with people. Sometimes it can put yourself in a lot of trouble, but by going through the pain of others, one discovers where pain descends from. By doing so, you give yourself a piece of advice in the end, ‘you don’t want to know where pain comes from’. Because if you do want to know, it surely will come your way.
Attraction. Physical attraction. Probably our genes, smart enough to know what a biological good match is. Not only physical attraction. The partner can offer social security as well. Emotional attraction. Partners that lean on each other, one more than the other, to obtain a good feeling that leads to falling in love. After the honeymoon weeks, things start to slow down in intensity and many influences make their way in to the evolution of the relation. Since one out of two relationships fall apart, it is obvious that with a lot of people an often hidden battle starts : ‘should we or I or shouldn’t we split’ ? Often one of the reasons for this kind of conduct is that one is afraid that the other one could find another partner and out of jealousy people sometimes even make babies which task in life it will be to find out where they come from. Maybe that newborn life is blessed with far less jealousy, in order to confront his parents. Maybe the next baby will grow up to be once again more jealous…in order to learn something from each other in this game called life.
People interfere in the lives of others, continuing their kind of never ending stories. They can start their story by not only telling stories of people they knew, but also the stories of their own. Their pains, their joys, their remedies. The story teller often explains the story from his or her angle, making it to nice or to black so while telling their story, they misjudge people. When the ones who listen, aren’t experienced enough or when they do not want to take a moral point of view or do not want to judge because they do not know the complete backgrounds of persons involved, a lot of later confusions are born.
So when there is interconnection that works, people touch each other for the first time in a special way…by words, an arm, a kiss maybe a few months later. The stories that begin in a slow platonic way, often can reach the same or more passion in every way. No problem so far, when people involved are single. One can be married or in another kind of relationship. The most wise thing to do is to continue in a platonic way. If one can let go of his or her feelings the other one, instead of taking a distance too, can become hopelessly unhappy, not only from the tensions at home, but because of an inner emptiness that isn’t answered any more by the challenge and excitement a new relationship can bring into life. Often one cannot find the same mutual interests in one person : intellectual things, mystical things, poetry, politics, literature and so on. But you do not need to start an physical relationship for that. But when that kind of very good feeling is there, bodies can show the desire to compare the depths of life in the physical dimensions as well. One can become very wet from each other(s) for years and years to come, or things can fall into the after honeymoon experience soon. Most of the people hide their love story for each other when there is a triangle involved. Some speak about it and even before things start getting ‘serious’. Splits often then occur, sometimes the third leg has to go, sometimes the third person revives the older relationship…surely in a physical way at least, but that, like the honeymoon experience is not of long duration when there is more interconnection with the soul of others involved. One can hesitate a long time to inform the existing relationship. It depends of one’s experiences, the ‘guilty’-thing about it. To make a triangle official is in fact recognizing that some existing ties came under pressure. Often it was before something new started. Sometimes it is because another love story started. In other cases both. In all cases life shows a bit about the truth about the prehistory of your love life that can go back your parents and so on…but the responsibility for it, in the end, is your own. That’s what feeling good is largely about.
Because of the complexity of things, when emotionally difficult matters are concerned; some people need other people to continue or complete their former relationships. The ones who are left on their own and can concentrate on other things besides those sometimes silly emotionally negative things…are rare. Fewer are the ones that have non hostile taught about their ‘rivals in love’. Often depressions follow, drinking, chasing others to get ‘even’, the same behavior as some women or men who had a bad relationship with their mother, father…they tend to take revenge on the later husband. Every negative emotion, in the end, always comes down to ‘fear’. Fear of not enough love, not enough money,…and so on. Love, if you have no fears, is a thing there is always plenty of. And because a lot of us have to many fears we invent a lot of things we can hide ourselves behind. Surely, when one is the second man or second wife in the play, and children are involved; one must be strong enough to take a distance. If it doesn’t work, in the end you have to make up your mind if you want a classical relation or not. ‘There surely must be some nice, uncomplicated candidates’ over there, one starts to think’ in that stage. When the triangle is to disappear because of a fourth person entering the stage, a new battle begins. The good old biological competition, or is it not all kinds of unfinished business of the past that lingers on in the present…pumps the adrenaline again. Deals are made and oats are sworn to prevent the new couple from being together. Interfering with the life of others has lots of inspiration…because too much bellybutton (ego) often can make a fool of both sexes. Even expressing emotions, feelings, talking doesn’t help anymore then…and often the bed has to make up…leaving others with their illusions and sometimes the new old couple as well. It isn’t an easy task, avoiding the meaningless. If you are close to it, the pressure will go up and one tends to explode if you have no inner calm any more. Sometimes it’s a good thing for your evolution when people start evolving more through other people. If one gets in to trouble of all kind, don’t give up to easily…or the future can hold a lot of more trouble ahead on other locations with other persons. It might. It might not. The silly old question, she(he)loves me…not. A crazy, but meaning full thing that fight against instability, the ups and downs. Octo 19/08/2009

February 6, 2010. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

they said he would send us the holy spirit

They said he would send us the holy spirit In many ways I tried to approach an number of fundamental things. The creation of cosmos due to the fact that something smaller or equal to nothing cannot exist. When meaningless is approached, pressure mounts and like the big bang explodes. That’s why everything has a meaning. Nihilism sucks. Sense could not be stopped. The voyage from radiation towards the first atom and cell and from then onwards towards us, the creation of the unique circumstances where this could happen, no, no lucky coincidence. Everything serves a purpose and nothing wants to become or can become meaningless. That’s why society is in evolution, trying to move away from the decadence of the worn out, towards more fulfillment in the new end. It might be a possibility that we do not take our chance and make a happy end of it all during this big bang cycle…just like we as individual, emotional beings sometimes desire to have more than one life to get the complete picture of who we are. I contributed a lot of essays to raise enthusiasm about these things (mainly in Dutch). All objective philosophical questions can be solved with science and history and you can find a lot of wonder and joie in it…a pity few people try. The subjective site of it all, the psychological reasons, the making sense of it all…well, one needs more to try to understand it and bring it over…by life itself and by culture, one can succeed. But still a lot of ‘the holy spirit’ of it all becomes clear by those strange kind of special energy, of ‘intuition’-like features…which aren’t as much a mystery, but a kind of energy that can trick you, but you cannot trick it back. This is no appeal to push logic and reason aside when one is dealing with rather sometimes irrational things as life and dead. One’s life is interconnected with others and sometimes it is not so easy to understand ‘why this is all happening to us’. There’s a structure in everything from a cell to an apple, and you name it. A lot has been invested to make life possible. We see and hear…and so on and still we manage to feel unhappy. We have a problem with considering all those beautiful things in nature as a unity, as seeing it as a part of us, part of the same adventure. Our sun is 5 billion years old and within another 5 billion years it will be over. Just a little more a dark spot in the milky way. Even the universe starts over and over again, like a day follows night…so, what are we afraid of…of death????
We often get to depressed to feel good. We cannot afford to pity ourselves or others…we must purchase our inner strength in a way that we do not bother others to much. Good will is of essence, but in can put you in a lot of trouble…and in times of trouble one often must persist, alone if necessary, to be able to understand afterwards why you had to go through the whole process. Often the answer is that it was because it was necessary to play a positive role in the life of others…but often in another way, by other means. You can long for compassion, comfort in certain periods in your life. But it’s better to rest and think things over and get a hold of yourself. To try to find out what you really are good in and act. There is a lot where one can be good in : let those who know how to offer compassion, compassionate, let the writers write, let the workers work instead of putting them without a job or taking too much of teir time for educating the philosophical part of themselves. Find joy. Do not be greedy, jealous or do not be bothered with other kinds of fear. Venin starts with thinking that you are beautiful and you miss a lot…whilst ignoring true beauty…the fruit of contemplation. We were put on a wonderful stage and we still don’t understand why…how can we take real pleasure in it, not understanding the whole picture ? Insight dictates our live, but we often fail to see. It can take quite a while before one has experienced all from every side to get the whole picture. Do good.

February 6, 2010. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

My name is combination

everybody has a name
everybody has a name My name is combination. I combine. The innocent aspirations of youth, with the illusions and desillusions of reality, of growing up, with the hope for new illusions to believe in, with the fate that we evolve to the real lessons, to the real feeling, to the best act in real art’s NOW—— I combine. The pains and joies of the past, with understanding the present ones with the aspirations of tomorrow with all the energy deep inside me—– I combine. The political theories with the working conditions, with te real emotional world of daily people, with wanting to change things—– I combine. The news on war, poverty, famine, with all kind of wealth disseases, with all kinds of unhappiness that reigns, with breaking the solitude of the individual—— I combine. The living and the dead, with the longing for fullfilment with wanting to recognise , who in fact I am, with observing all kinds of forgotten energies—— I combine. Friendship and Love and Lust with satisfaction and negative emotions, with solutions and new problems, with rest and unease—- I combine, I combine, I combine. I cannot do otherwise, aldough I try, I always have to combine. Because combination shall be my name untill it’s no longer necessary… And I?ll become part of another world ? combination Is there an energy with a comparable consciousness as ours, which did not need to follow the same evolutionary road ? octo

February 6, 2010. Tags: , . Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

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February 6, 2010. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.